Worlds Greatest Man Dunks Basketball

A long chill fills the stadium air.
A Japanese politician watches anxiously as Kik ho Man, a member of the audience who was has been put in the spotlight tonight after perenial champion “Old man in white karate outfit” has injured himself upon entering the arena.
“Old man in white disco outfit” is incredibly old and especially feeble. Years of trampoline dunking or “distance dunking” as its called in Barbados, have worn almost every body part of Old man in white disco outfits body. He can barely dress himself, but he barely dresses himself very well.
Whilst walking to the trampon, the Japanese term for trampoline, “Old man in white disco outfit” was let go by his handler “tiny woman seen by the side of Japanese Politician who is not only Japanese Politician’s assistant but the handler of ‘Old man in white disco outfit'”.
“Old man in white disco outfit” cannot walk on his own, but he continues to try to stay in the competition, surely his family would execute him if ever he retired.
When falling “Old man in white disco outfit” broke several bones in his ankle, hand and other hand. The Japanese politician instructs his assistant to place “Old man in disco outfit” on the trampoline but “Old Man in white disco outfit” begins his heart attack.
“Is there a doctor in the house” screams the tiny assistant to the dismay of both of her superiors. “Old man in white disco outfit” cannot bear the shame of a fifth heart attack and the Japanese Politician is shamed by the shame of others . . . vicariously.
Kik Ho Man, not a surgeon but an amateur distance dunker and pathological liar rushes to the stage proclaiming “I am a doctor”.
The assistant jumps into Kik Ho Man’s arms exclaiming “save my slave master and I will be yours forever!”
She will be, but Japanese Politician is has an angle to play.
“The woman will be yours . . . only if you pass the trial” the politicians states will cold abandon.
“But I have never done this before” says Kik Ho Man.

You know the rest, man dunks ball, gets girl while and Old man in a disco outfit dies from the excitement. A girl has a new slave owner and Kik Ho Man is now the Micheal Jordan of dunking. Surely the Japanese politician goes home and kills himself, in a dignified manner.

What does this all mean? Barack Obama can end world hunger

211

So, it’s February 11, and as I was writing something for a totally unrelated project [actually…I’ll probably just paste that in here after I’m finished just to qualify this as an ‘original’ post because I had to make that stupid comment a few back about ‘only original posts’…well folks, I’m an idiot, and a hypocrite. Enough said.] I stumbled upon this piece of nostalgia that I had no idea even existed:

That’s right, the Ramones are even cooler than you ever imagined. The ‘Rock And Roll High School’ remake can kiss my ass compared to these!

[The rock and roll high school remake will be shit…don’t let that last comment confuse you]

[full entry]

The Question Everyone Is Asking

I saw this on the train platform the other day and decided it was baffling enough to take photo’s of. And so here it is, the question everyone wants to know:

which is it?

Collectively Ridiculous

I got the chance to see another Collectively Ridiculous show at the Old Town Pub in Pasadena this past weekend, and I have to say they really are one of the better new bands I’ve seen in a very long time. Sometimes it’s hard to get into a purely instrumental group, but these guys are masters of their craft, they take playing music seriously, and look like they’re having fun doing it! This is a great version of Deep Purple’s ‘Fireball’. Check ’em out, seriously, you won’t be disappointed.

[note, I’m still playing around with compression and trying to find the best/easiest video encoding site. This video didn’t look as dark on my monitors at home when I was editing it. You’re gonna get some real professionalism here after a bit, so enjoy this while it lasts! You’re gonna miss the day of grainy, dark, distorted video, be warned!]

myspace.com/collectivelyridiculous

Sightseeing With A Blind Guy

I guess this should have been called something like ‘sightseeing FOR a blind guy’, but since zero effort was put into the video, even less effort will be put into the naming of it. And that’s how we roll…effortless.

This was created out of being stuck in a car for ten hours while driving to northern CA. Oh don’t you worry, there’s way more where this came from! WAY more.