Oh, the life of a lonely has been. The holidays come and go so quickly these days it’s hard to believe they even exist at all. This classic sung by Elvis Presley has such a more melancholy twist to it when you consider exactly where it was coming from…heart break and desperation in the digital age. Enjoy!
RE: leave me alone brendan
I know it’s been awhile since we last talked, but I wanted to see if you were still planning on coming over for Christmas eve. I’ve got the house decorated just the way you liked it in the past. In fact, it hasn’t changed much since you left. I hadn’t realized how much of the cleaning you did when you were around here and really just noticed the dust that’s been collecting on the makeup bag you kept in my bathroom, so it’s probably ruined. It’s ok though, I think Santa is planning on sneaking a new one under the tree this year (wink wink) LOL…
So I was hoping you’d bring over a ham or turkey or something like we did last year, my refrigerator hasn’t been keeping things cool very well for the past couple months, it looks like a bunch of Del Taco wrappers got stuck in the fan or something, but it’s ok I’ve been keeping a carton of egg nog on ice for the past couple of days. The neighbors have been really cool about me coming over every couple of hours to get another hand full.
I hadn’t noticed that the lights were all still strung up around the gutter, seems like we were both having such a busy summer we never got the chance to take them down. I figured you’d gotten my messages about them but I’m sure you’re just like me and can’t answer your phone all the time when you’re out and about with all your friends and things. I even thought i saw Jenna the other day at the Ralphs you guys always shop at, but it must not have been her because when i started calling her name she turned around like I wasn’t there and started walking back to her car XD! It was so funny cuz she must have been like ‘why does this guy think he knows me!?’, then got into her car and sped away forgetting why she came to the grocery store at all ! LMAO
So, the postman must not have gotten the card we left for him last year because he absolutely REFUSES to deliver the little notes i’ve been sending you, I think he really likes punishing me because he still takes my rent checks and water bills on time!!! I even tried to hand deliver them the other day when i came over to shovel your walkway but the door man just turned me right away in the christmas spirit and told me I didn’t need to bother with it it was taken care of. He must be using that Eagle Flex I see on TV cuz I think I still have a bruise from when he missed my hand when offering a handshake and grabbed my wrist instead! ROFL Then he practiced his swing dancing moves as he walked me back to my car! :P
Ok, so dinner will probably be at seven, I’ve got the tree up and ready to go with all your favorite red ornaments on it (it seems like it was almost yesterday me and you were putting them all on there, it feels like I never took it down ;) shhhhh don’t tell anyone!)
Make sure you bring gifts! I’ve put on a few pounds for the holidays if you’re looking to get me a new pair of dungarees (im a 48X30 now in case the elves forgot). You know how sad we get around here when you don’t RSVP (but if you want to show up unannounced we won’t be upset either). Looking forward to seeing your lovely face!
Love, your loving lover, better half, and soul mate,
XOXOXO SMOOCH SWAK